Miss 10's Letter

As part of Miss 10's homework this week she had to write a letter to the author of the book she's reading.  As I previously posted she is current hooked on "Eats, Shites and Leaves".  Here is her letter:

Mr A. Parody

Author: “Eats, Shites and Leaves”

February 29, 2012

Dear Mr Parody

I have taken your advise and I will not never use double negatives.  I will not repeat myself and avoid being repetitive.  I will no indulge in sesquipedalian lexical constructions.  I will not over use exclamation marks!!! And again I will not repeat myself or say again what I have said before.

I know a man with a wooden leg named Smith too!!!

Have you ever asked yourself “Why when the stars are out they can be seen but when the lights are out they can’t be seen?”

The Inglish language iz annoying that’s a guarantee becoz it cause koass for foreners and not foreners.

Has it ever occurred to you … that feet smell and noses run?  Why the human race will not win the race against time?

Why is it that you can walk down a road even if it does uphill? Why people sit down in the day and sit up in the night?

Yes, exaggerating is a million times worse than understatement.

Always employ the vernacular!!!

Regards your loyal reader,

[Redacted]

(Note: All misspellings and incorrect grammar are from the book)

I was impressed.